The Latest In "I'm a Terrible Millennial"

I'm a bad millennial. That's been established already. I was reading up on a New York Times article about what happens when an office is all millennials, and I was horrified. I wouldn't employ these goons. It was really very eye-opening.

So, let's get an updated list of all the things that make me suck at being a member of my generation:

1. I don't like Beyonce.
2. I don't understand why people are putting their picture in with resumes. 
3. I'm voting for Hillary, proudly, over Bernie.
4. I've never been to Colorado, and don't really plan to.
5. I don't have a beard.
6. I don't do cross-fit.
7. Give me an old-school lager over a craft beer.
8. I don't really hike.
9. I don't care that soda is bad for me.
10. Drake sucks, give me back Biggie and Pac.
11. I hate Steph Curry.
12. The NFL is definitely not my favorite sport.
13. I admit I don't really know a damn thing about soccer while i'm watching Premier League.
14. Yes, really, the "tourist-trap" cheesesteak place known as Pat's is easily my favorite in Philadelphia.
15. I think Williamsburg sucks. If we're going to Brooklyn, give me Bay Ridge or Red Hook.
16. Michael Jordan would actually school all these fools playing ball today.
17. This term "mansplaining" is over-used, if you ask me.
18. Baseball fans who couch everything in sabermetrics terms annoy me.
19. I don't like libertarians.
20. Give me a steak.

Updates to come.